High School Comparisons

To those of you who may have met me in only the past few years, this may be a surprise to you. In high school, I was that almost nameless guy with close to zero confidence, who just slept in class and did jack shit else. The funny part is, I got shitty grades in english class because I had not yet realized my awesome potential of being a clever, witty, super bomb-ass ladies man. (laugh all you want dick hats, I rule, and write like a fucking genius!)

The point of this post is, if I could do it all over again, I would truly learn the lessons taught to us by Saved by the Bell, and rock that shit. If I had to do it all over again, for lack of an even more extreme character, I would be Zach Morris. He obviously was the alpha male of the show, yet he also had a genuine caring side that made him so likable to everybody (like me!). His defining characteristic, besides his haircut and good looks, was pure confidence. His level of confidence, without generic asshole cockiness, is what totally landed him the ideal high school relationship; an on and off again with the hottest cheerleader in town, Kelly Kapowski (although she turned out to be a semi-fatty as show in White Collar.)

Now my confidence level has grown exponentially over the past few years because of several reasons. I now know that I am a sexy piece of man meat, I joined the fucking Marines, and I now know that there is no one or nothing that can hold me back from getting what I desire. Even as this confidence was still slowly developing, say 4 years ago, I had high school girls drooling over my sexy ass; and yes my ass is very sexy, especially naked. Nowadays, if I was attracted to girls over the age of 14, the local high schools would be in fucking trouble!

The point of all this rambling tipsy bullshit is, if you are a man and you want something, fucking take it! If you live by that motto, the whole world is fucking yours. You may say that Kevin, you are an average guy who hasn't taken shit for cock, so what the fuck are you talking about? Well to that I would say, 1. Fuck you, and 2. My morality and standards prevent me from having everything I desire. I will post on this as soon as I learn how to get rid of this damn conscience.

I know I set out to compare and contrast myself now and whatever the fuck I was in high school, and it turned out to be a bunch of rambling bullhonky. Shit happens. If you don't like it, then don't buy my book when it never comes out because I don't have that much patience.

I should write a fucking book. Topics for this project would be appreciated in the comments, go!